ESP bridges the gap

30.03.23: THE FINALS of the World Bridge Tournament were halted dramatically today amid claims that players had been cheating.

The pan-European contestants, George and Georgia Blackwood ­ who astounded bridge-watchers earlier this week by achieving a grand slam with only two aces between them ­ are now having tests to check their brains for so-called telepathy bugs.

These minute implants can transmit and receive information from brain to brain, producing a crude form of telepathy, depending on their positioning. If you have a transmitter fitted in Broca's area (the part of the brain responsible for language articulation) and someone else has one fitted in Wernicke's area (responsible for language comprehension), you can exchange thoughts.

"You wouldn't want to conduct diplomatic negotiations using these bugs," says surveillance expert Jessica Scholl, "but they're fine if it's just a few specific words you want to convey ­ 'jack of diamonds', for example."

Telepathy bugs were developed by the Anglo army for use in undercover anti-terrorist operations, and the commercial arm of the military now markets them worldwide as an aid for the deaf. The sale and fitting of such devices is strictly controlled: only one military neurologist in Britain is licensed to perform the operation.

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